I had my eye on some beautifully embroidered Topshop Jamie jeans for months and one day I finally bought them. I had been shopping for ages that afternoon and having tried on too many things already, I was way too tired to try on something else. Plus I knew my size in Jamie jeans and so I didn’t see the need to get naked in another fitting room. On the way home, I was feeling all sassy knowing that the content of my paper carrier bag was very very cute. When I finally got home (and un-prisoned my feet from my high heels) the first thing I did was show my housemates the new purchase. They agreed how cute the jeans were!
HOWEVER, after a few minutes my rose tinted glasses came off and I realised that they didn’t actually look that great on my body (I mean they looked OK but I have jeans that are wayyy more flattering). The material of these particular Jamie jeans felt stiffer than my other Jamie jeans and the embroidery didn’t allow the material to hug my booty as well.
I was in such a dilemma because the jeans were so nice and I had wanted them for ages BUT I knew that they just weren’t right for me. I mean I did try to persuade myself to keep them, but my intuition was telling me that I can’t keep them for their looks alone; they needed to make me feel good too…and sadly they didn’t. My housemates tried to convince me to keep them but I had to go with my gut. And that’s what I did, I put them back into the carrier bag and mentally prepared to let go of them.
After all that jazz I now live happily ever after, knowing that the jeans will find another happy wearer and I will one day find a pair of jeans that are not only equally as pretty but also right for me.
I know it sound a bit dramatic but the jeans scenario is symbolic of a much bigger theme of letting go in general of people, self-insecurities, jobs and memories. It also ties in with the idea of death (one that is very well outlined in a book called Women who run with the Wolves. I know it sounds over the top but just bear with me.
In our current culture death is seen as something bad, an unwelcome visitor. However, in other parts of the world it is seen as important and positive as new life. They realise that for something new to be born death needs to occur. Plants need to die in order for them to decompose and release nutrients into the soil, which will be utilised for new plants to blossom. Weaker animals need to die in order for food to be available for fitter animals to eat and ultimately produce offspring. Self-doubt needs to die in order for self-confidence to be born. We humans are also part of the natural life and death cycle and we therefore need to need to see it as a natural stage in our lives too- running away from death is going against the grain. We need to allow death to proceed and the way we let that happen is by letting go and not clinging onto something that deep DEEP down we know is not leading you closer to bliss.
I could of kept those jeans because on paper they sound fabulous, but I had to let them go and allow my relationship (never got so deep about a pair of jeans before lol) with that pair to die. That way I can once again allow myself to buy a new pair of jeans (I couldn’t justify keeping those and buying another pair as I reallyyyy do not need another pair) and allow myself the chance to find ones that actually flatter my body shape.
This applies to so many areas of our life. But it’s hard to let go because most of us rather have something (anything) rather than have nothing at all. Consequently, we can get used to feeling a negative emotion that we don’t even realise that we need to let it go and that you can have a different experience of life. But by doing this we aren’t letting go (the part that is no longer making them happy) and hence not letting our life proceed through a new door. But by not letting things die, new birth, new happiness (the happiness that they crave) will never enter our lives.
Nature doesn’t like empty spaces as my auntie always says and therefore as soon as we really let go (physically and mentally) something new will always come along.
Lots of kisses,